關於我自己

我的相片
1981年生,天蠍座,台北人,前高中教師,現職家庭主婦。

2013年7月30日 星期二

什麼是能招喚幸福的性行為


我並沒有很多的性經驗,寫性的主題好像也不是很適合,不過個人部落格就是這樣,想寫什麼不過是抒發個人的看法,及個人對身邊朋友的觀察,衛道人士請退散。

身邊有幾個女性朋友,她們普遍是事業有成,有的賺得很多,賺的不多的,倒也經濟獨立不虞匱乏:

L,長得漂亮,如果不注意看的話,以她高挑的身材及ㄋㄞ功,和林志玲相似度極高。我為何說不注意看呢,我看年紀非常準,從肌膚的紋理、色澤,看得出來她應該36.7。她有兩個小孩,離過一次婚,外文能力佳。我老公同辦公室有兩位同事都I和M都和他有性關係,那兩位同事都是已婚。我不理解,和已婚的人保持固定的性關係是想要做什麼? 恩,也就是炮友,雖然我覺得炮有這個名詞把性講的好低俗,但也許對有些人來說,就真的只是肉慾上的發洩吧...有那麼缺嗎? 可能我還是蠻有傳統思想的,總覺得女人當了母親,凡事總是要收斂些,但是這位奇女子竟然還可以經常去泡夜店、鬼混。(實在羨慕她有媽媽可以幫忙帶小孩.....) 連我帶來的好朋友J,也在一次聚會之中成為她的石榴裙下的會員,妙的是M和J兩人還同時成了好朋友,可能兩個人都是外國人,知道這層表兄弟關係心照不宣之下倒也不介意。另外我也不明白,男人啊,真的很奇怪,是我愛玩的話,喂,我步入婚姻前可是有名的惡名昭彰,曾經一次有兩個男朋友,也曾不小心介入別人的婚姻,連我這種已經算是敢愛敢恨敢玩的人,都覺得不能接受把同一個圈子的男人睡過一遍,所以就算我是男人就算要找人睡,也沒辦法跟有名的公車睡,腦中會忍不住想到其他人在她身上馳騁沙場的場景...完全不能接受阿! 所以這女人到底在想什麼??

另外總是和前男友糾纏不清的A,前陣子前男友又來找她,她信誓旦旦跟我保證不會睡在一起,後來果真又是把持不住。我早就料到,因為一個男人久不聯絡,對你忽然沒事獻殷勤,絕對絕對就是有鬼,不是要借錢就是想上床。她一跟我宣告,我自是滿臉嫌惡(腦裡想到慾望城市裡夏綠蒂對莎曼沙說:你的陰道是紐約的觀光景點嗎!) ,她默默地聳聳肩:"我單身那麼久了,我也有需要阿!" 這沒有問題,但是今天你口口聲聲說你要的是可以結婚的對象,你找來個炮友,可以結婚嗎~? 這就大有問題了!

女人有需要我會不明白嗎? 姊姊我也30了,步入婚姻之前也是認為自己是金盆洗手,玩夠了。需要這種東西很詭異,因為大家所認為的需要有程度上的不同。坦白來說我覺得用性玩具絕對比跟超級爛的男人上床來的簡單方便、乾淨利落。

我一直藏在心裡不能說的秘密是:性從來都不該是免費的。縱使表面上身為一個女權主義者,當然,要怎樣去玩,越誇張越隨便越好,為了女權主義! 但我從來就不是那種人放得開的豪放女。朋友都說我認識的男人怎麼可以疼我照顧我到完全離譜的程度,我認為性本身是一種獨佔行為,如果一個女人自己先破壞了獨佔市場,既然人人可以得到你的身體,那還會有人珍惜你嗎? 女人應該愛惜羽毛,給值得的人,如果沒有那個人,也真的寧缺勿濫,不然可是會亂了行情。當你總是讓男人滿足,為了獨佔你,他自然就願意承諾、願意付出(關起房門來我是會使出渾身解數來滿足男人的女人!)。性絕對是控制人本能最重要的一環,一切都是基於性的滿足。要男人負責就是,讓他非常清楚,跟你就是沒有玩免費的這種事情。態度要相當明確。分了就分了,沒瓜葛不互相約束的炮友也不行,這是對自己基本的尊重。

相信我,我曾經也差點落入變成炮友的陷阱,劈腿的男人,被揭發後要我轉為地下夫人,嘴上說想跟我在一起,只是需要時間處理。我他媽的給他一個禮拜,見他也沒特殊表示,覺得他應該打算打持久戰,我馬上搬家,真的是馬上! 如果不斷個乾淨,只會徒增痛苦,讓好姻緣也不敢靠近。30歲以後,這點道理還不懂就遜了。

很需要有炮友、性慾很強的女人,不是說你們不好,只是,不要找明明真的屌已經爛掉,你跟他也沒可能再續前緣的對象,那樣只是浪費時間。我理解市場很亂、大家很忙、但是在城市裡留給性一點點純真,絕對是只有好處。真的很需要,要找也找還沒開發過的,假意交往一下,試探他的床上功夫,真的不好再找藉口甩掉,一是有開發到市場,一是彼此既有交往事實,就算傳出去倒也不損名節,搞不好睡著睡著找到你的如意郎君也不一定,這就是我說,能招喚幸福與不能招喚幸福的性行為的差別。

後記: 當然也有些男人是特例,會對人盡可夫的女人動真感情,像是戲劇裡愛上蕩婦卡門的軍官,我就有認識那種人!那種男人往往是無可救藥的浪漫主義者,金錢方面前左手進右手出,完全不是可以託付終身的類型,個性也很邊緣、不成熟,工作一個換一個,內心永遠長不大,其實只覺得有奶可吸最重要,可以為肉體關係付出一切。我覺得那樣的男人啊...八成是口腔期沒滿足,要的是一種象徵性的"母體"罷了...。真的覺得就算吸引這種男人也無所謂,也只能說每個人人生所追求的不同,邊緣化的另類生活,有些脫離本部落格討論的範圍了

2013年7月11日 星期四

[新聞] 加拿大淫豬禁錮女老師一年


社會中心/高雄報導
欺人太甚!高雄市一名美豔熟女,去年上網認識加拿大籍男子艾德華,2人旋即墜入愛河,未料同居後,艾德華露出本性,動輒對她拳打腳踢,還拿偷拍的性愛光碟嗆聲「So Cheap(低賤)」,威脅熟女當他的性奴隸,時間長達一年,直到10日晚間,艾德華因他案被逮捕,熟女才重獲自由,結束這場恐怖的異國戀情。
高雄警方表示,25歲加拿大籍男子艾德華(Edward Sant),涉嫌傷害等罪,去年遭判刑確定,但他棄保潛逃,被通緝期間四處在台流浪,最後落腳於高雄鼓山區的知名私立幼稚園「麥米倫」工作。承辦員警不解的是,艾德華持旅行簽證來台,護照早在去年5月就過期,「業者怎隨便就僱用一個通緝犯?
◄之前鄉民實驗過,大頭照換成長相普通的外國人,一下子就要到一堆台灣女生的電話。(圖/取自網路)
去年中,艾德華利用洋男把台妹神器-手機通訊軟體「SKOUT」認識高雄一名熟女,雖然他不諳中文,但熟女英文不錯,2人很有話聊,見面後天雷勾動地火,沒多久就開始交往,艾德華為避人耳目,遂提出同居要求,熟女沒想太多欣然接受,未料這竟是長達一年惡夢的開始。
一般談到歐美男性,許多女生都會幻想他們獨立、體貼又溫柔,但在艾德華身上,卻完全看不到這些特質!熟女友人透露,艾德華控制慾極強、個性火爆又愛吃醋,熟女稍有對應惹他不爽,即換來一頓毒打。艾德華體重破百,身型龐大,嬌弱的熟女哪禁得起他照三餐打,結果沒2個月就被揍得不成人型,嚇得不敢出門,連工作都丟了。
熟女為擺脫這個「白色惡魔」,提出分手要求,艾德華竟拿出偷拍的性愛光碟,威脅說敢分手「就讓全世界都看到妳的OO!」狡猾的艾德華為求自保,還複製了一份給他遠在加拿大的弟弟,熟女後來輾轉得知,被偷拍威脅控制的台妹不只她一個,她只不過是眾多受害者中的一人。
好在法網恢恢,疏而不漏!艾德華不只對女友施暴,在外也自恃人高馬大「高人一等」,常與他人起衝突、起爭議,結果不知被誰舉報護照過期,警方一查發現,這名自稱美語老師的外籍男竟是逃亡多時的通緝犯,趕緊連夜派人將他捉拿到案。
10日艾德華被架回派出所,一般腳鐐根本銬不住,只見他態度囂張,辯稱自己不懂中文,持續用英文大小聲、挑釁員警,葉姓副所長見他越來越過份,忍不住拍桌怒斥,「You!給我安靜(台語)!
艾德華被此突來舉動嚇到,悻悻然地用台語回:「厚啦、厚啦。」乖乖擺出「啾咪」的姿勢拍檔案照,看到他一副得了便宜又賣乖的樣子,員警在一旁氣得牙癢癢,「真想揍他!」
因艾德華是有案在身的通緝犯,不管熟女或其他被害台妹要不要提告,艾德華都必須在牢裡乖乖服完刑期,熟女聽完警方說明,這時才放下心中一塊大石頭,一邊流著淚一邊感謝員警,泣訴自己終於擺脫「加拿大版恐怖情人」!


2013年7月3日 星期三

[轉錄] 「令人噁心但肉體很迷人」 外國人眼中的台灣女人

本篇據傳原文是台灣英文老師所寫的,PTT鄉民協助翻譯。我老公看完以後跟我說他的三個感想:1.這英文不太通順,真的是外國人寫的嗎? 2.這情況其實可以套用在各個大城市,大城市這種拜金女總是很多,不是台灣而已。3.他覺得這位老兄可能也不是那麼酷,所以這些女生也不想屈意奉承他,對他搞不好也只是想用用就丟,所以彼此彼此。(不得不誇讚我老公真理性阿)

我的意見: 其實能夠辯才無礙,有想法的女生,在台灣男生眼裡就是不合格,台灣男生也對自己沒信心,所以女生太有意見,他們會覺得自己常常被反駁,有損男性自尊,當然,工作能力太強,賺的比男生多也不太合格,所以怎麼能怪亞洲女生好像都不付錢? (我自己是不會讓男生付啦,但說真的我不會覺得那種女生特別怎樣。會計較的男生的確令人感覺小氣) 溫柔順從絕對是台灣男生擇偶的要件。所以老外覺得台灣女生講話就是沒深度,虛榮、太注重他人的看法,對自己沒信心,做作矯情,其實是這是典型台灣男生喜歡的類型阿!

台灣的分工是只要一結婚,男人在外面花天酒地沒關係,只要錢給得夠就好了,所以女人負責照顧家,因此錢相對來說就更重要了,因為你去外面花最後還給不出家用不是更糟糕嗎! (外國人的婚姻真的比較平等互惠) 這種女生在台灣才是最有市場、最受歡迎的,所以只要不是這類型,就只能跟我一樣公主和親啦! 最後,那個ABC寫得多機車阿! 典型的亞洲男人會有的想法,內心充滿了不尊重女性的黑暗面,這種Banana絕對絕對是市場裡最糟糕的,他們往往會說:我從來都不Dating亞洲人(然後把亞洲女生罵得半死) ,他們覺得自己能跟白種人在一起很優越,靠,這不是顯出他內心的自卑嗎?


原文如下
============================

Let's be fair here. I have a gorgeous, adorable Taiwanese girlfriend that I am willing to spend the rest of my life with. Not because she is Hello Kitty, submissive, shallow, brain dead and a good fuck. Because she calls herself a freak (a surprisingly foxy one) , standing out from that essentially numbed crowd that I call most of Taiwan (excluding the "hen qi guay" lot), in ways that make most other girls look like total idiots.

就這方面而言,我想講幾句實在話:我有一個台灣女朋友,看起來漂亮又大氣。我很願意跟她共度下半輩子。我之所以如此,不是因為她對丈夫言聽計從,不是因為她腦袋死板,不是因為她只是個空花瓶(譯註:原文為Hello Kitty,猜測有「空花瓶」之意),而是她有別於大部份的台灣女性(撇開那些「很奇怪」的人),敏感又大膽(我的美艷狐狸精!),不像那些女生一樣低能。

My hat goes to her even more knowing that she only lived 3 months in the US, while being naturally open minded and full of dynamic debates about all kinds of issues. Yes, she has all those traits that many guyswould want.

我的女友只在美國住在三個月,然而心胸寬廣,毫不做作,能與人辯論眾多話題,這使我更喜愛她了!沒錯,許多人所冀望的優點,她全都有了!

There are indeed some very interesting and charming ladies out here, but to the best of my knowledge, they are depressingly rare. Why? Because aside from being good at shallow chat followed by a deep fuck, one, two, here, there and everywhere, most girls here just about do a good job of sucking in all manner possible. Sex aside, let's not even get into how much worse it gets for 95% of TW born and raised guys when it comes to friendship with foreigners.

台灣還是有漂亮又引人注目的女士,然而,就我所知,他們非常的稀少,稀少到讓人沮喪。為什麼呢?這裡大部分的女孩子,只會跟你聊一些五四三的,然後再跟你來幾次深度的體液交換(在哪裡搞都行!),而她們為一擅長的事情,就是用各種可能的方式吹喇叭。不談性事了,我更覺得有95%的台灣人不善於跟外國人來往。

Yes the long eyelashed and legs empty egg-shells are gold diggers, oozing superficial arrogance that would turn a sensible man like myself into a sexual vice animal against it.

台灣女生睫毛長、腿長、腦袋空(譯註:我不懂empty egg-shells何意,我也懶得查,我隨便翻,你們隨便看。)、貪財、膚淺又驕矜自恃。我本明理,一遇到這群女生,卻成了任由性慾擺佈的野獸。


(圖片來源於網路,與本文無關)
Even many of those who can speak decent English will rarely go beyond conversations about shopping, food, travel (if they dare to pretend knowing anything worthwhile about the real world beyond American and Japanese shopping malls) and maybe, just maybe, fun sex.

台灣女生有不少人會說英文;然而,她們聊天的主題總是圍繞在「購物」、「食物」、「旅遊」,很少有例外。(就算她們裝得「知性美」,想把話題扯到更現實的東西,除了美國商場和日本血拼商店外, 他們也想不出什麼,哦,或許在聊性事方面會有趣一點啦。)

Take things further into the arts, music, DECENT movies beyond Hollywood,politics, science and philosophy, I would say that 90% of people in Taiwan are "educated" to work, not to please the depths of themselves and others in particularly subtle ways.

至於藝術、音樂、好萊塢之外的電影、政治、科學、哲學,那就算了吧。我只能說,90%的台灣人之所以受教育,都只是為了工作,而非挖掘自己和他人在某些細微方面所產生的深度差異。

The worst thing about all this is that the truly fascinating side of Chinese culture is either a political conundrum for not knowing which side to choose, or is slowly sinking face first into oblivion. There is room for tremendous melting pot in Taiwan, but not much is being done about it.

最糟糕還不只是這樣:中國文化最令人著迷的一面,就是其政治思想;中國政治家不斷問自己:「政治上,到底要怎麼做才是對的?」(譯註:中庸!?)要不然乾脆隱姓埋名(譯註:隱士!?),讓眾人遺忘。這種政治思想可以造就出一個超級族群大融爐,然而台灣到目前為止卻還沒為此做出半點東西。

This is not a blind assault at intercultural differences, but a good stab at old social etiquettes that were ditched in the 60 and 70's in the West.

我之所以這麼說,絕對不是無的放矢,也沒有無視於文化差異,而是想改變舊社會的陳腐思想,而這些思想則在60年代和70年代遭西方人遺棄。

The family, school, work ethics to my opinion kills people's potential.Taiwan has grown economically, but it will reach full maturity only aftera hard look at itself in relation to the rest of the world, while learning to accept and integrate true differences, like other Asian places such as Singapore have learned to do, to make for a much nicer place to live and fit in with open minded people.

就我來看,台灣的家庭、工作倫理、學校系統扼殺個人潛力。台灣近幾年來經濟大幅成長;然而,想要成為一個完全成熟的社會,台灣就得正視他與世界的關係,並學習接受及整合兩造之間的差異。新加坡曾經所做的改革的,台灣也可以傚法,這麼一來,台灣會變得更好,人民心胸也會變得寬大。

In the meantime, it comes across as easy for Taiwanese people to be pleasant and smiling on the surface, but I do believe that their most visceral personal and social identity dangerously lacks confidence and awareness with others at best, or is totally uninterested and racist deep within, ever so silently.

台灣人表面很和善又樂觀;然而,我不覺得他們真的是這樣,他們缺乏足夠自信和觀察力,不能真實表達個人情緒和認同感;換個講法,就是他們其實很冷漠,骨子裡又帶有種族偏見,只是他們從來沒講出來罷了。

As an Adult Business Teacher, i listen to a lot of answers to topic questions in my class. when the topic gets around to love and relationships you always hear TW Girls saying the same exact shit.

我在一家成人英語補習班教授商用英文,跟學生聊過很多事情,也聽到不少回應。當我和學生聊到愛情和兩性關係之類的主題,台灣女孩子的回答都一樣,又臭又糟糕。

" i want a guy who is tall, understands me, is responsible, etc"

像是:「最好又高,了解我,又負責任,我最喜歡這樣的男孩子了。」之類的。


The problem with this is they never really define what responsible is.From my experience, what they mean by responsible is "safe". They want some castrated man with spiked hair who never takes chances, never moves in a direction that might make them feel unsafe, never walks the path less chosen. They want a guy who is just bent to their wishes for "their dreams" ie, the house, the car, the baby, the whole nine yards.

她們所謂的責任感,到底是什麼?這就是問題所在。就我長期觀察,她們所謂的「責任感」,其實就是「安全感」。她們想要一個男人,這個男人可以任由她們擺佈(譯註:任由擺佈,castrated被閹割的,衍生為"毫無男子氣概");這男人從不會令他們感到不安;這男人最好盲從大眾,在人生旅程內,不會走那些崎嶇小徑。她們想要一個男人,這個男人最好能依照她們的意願行事,最好能將她們的意願當作自己的夢想,最好替她們買個房子,買輛車子,養個娃兒,買一堆東西!

Nothing is wrong with those things, except that they have become the "Price For Admission" so to speak, rather than the result of two people's love and efforts for one another. They constantly take shortcuts.

其實這也沒什麼。然而,她們總把這些事情當作是「愛的門票」,而非「兩人互信互愛的結果,彼此付出」的結果。她們喜歡抄小路,而非走康莊大道。

These Women always talk about how they want someone who understands them. By this, i take it to mean they want an extension of their spoiling family or old boyfriends (Plan B... but still wait around) who will put up with their temper tantrums, immaturity, and stupidity.These women are basically in the market for either daddy or their older brother, someone who is used to their bullshit.

台灣女人總希望某人可以了解自己;換句話說,她們就是想要有一個人,能像自己的家人和男朋友一樣,忍受自己的壞脾氣、不成熟、還有愚蠢。這些女人基本上沒什麼市場,除了自己老爹和哥哥之外,沒人受得了她們的鳥脾氣。

Expecting someone to understand you is the height of immaturity.We should seek more to understand others than to be understood.The world owes us nothing, but we live in it, and should learn to adapt to it, not the other way around.

想要某人了解自己,這本來就是「不成熟的極致表現」。我們應該試著了解別人,而非怨恨別人不了解自己(譯註:子曰:「不患人之不己知;患不知人也。」)。這世界沒欠我們什麼,而我們卻寄身於此,我們應該學習「與世界和諧相處」,而非「教世界與我們和諧相處」。

i find TW women to be utterly selfish, insecure, and self centered.As I have seen with many couples and unfortunate friends,when they age it's even more nonstop bitching and moaning. Thefocus just becomes on more money, more eating, more competition to show off to family and friends. You can forget about an exciting sex life. Lately i look at them with a mild disgust, despite some of their physical beauty.

台灣女人特別自私,自我中心,又很沒安全感。我看過很多夫妻檔和不幸的朋友,當他們老了,還得忍受自己的伴侶不停犯賤和抱怨。她們就是想要更多的錢,吃更多的東西,向自己的家庭和朋友炫耀。你別想說有刺激快樂的性生活,我一向覺得台灣女人有點噁心,雖然她們肉體還是有迷人之處。


No pussy is worth being constantly drained by these emotional vampires. Funny, with the many new girls I meet here, I aways say to myself"this one is different". LOL! Nope, same shit with a different package.Same movie played over and over.

台灣女人個性善變,像個吸血鬼,她們的鮑不值得追求。我也曾經遇過幾個女孩,試圖說服自己:「這些女孩跟其他女人不一樣。」這很奇妙。然而,英雄聯盟啊!她們換湯不換藥,與其他女人一樣爛。相同的悲劇一再發生。

Oh Well, at least have a little fun, play their game, complement them on how brilliant it is to wear glasses without lenses, expect to pay for lots of dinners out. And most important....Yes, indeed,know when to say next. Their stock will drop in value quick and is a short sale. HK Girls are a way better catch.

好吧,玩她們的遊戲,看她們戴上「沒有鏡片的眼鏡」,稱讚她們有多好看,請她們吃晚餐,這些事的確還有點趣味。最重要的就是:「該換下一個,就換下一個了。」她們的價值就像股票賣空一樣,下跌得很快。香港的女孩子好多了呢!

====================================================
這是一個美國華僑的心得:

I'm ABC and came back to Taiwan (I've had my share of girlfriends in USA). In 5 years staying here (and dating several TWN girls from 25-36yos, here is my take: Taiwanese women are narcissists, especially if she is even slightly attractive. Most of them live off their parents. If they are well-off, forget about scoring with them unless you are more well-off than them, their parents will find every reason in the world NOT to be with you.

我是一個回到台灣居住的美國華僑(譯註:America-born Chinese),在美國曾與幾個女孩子交往過。在台灣待了五年,跟許多台灣女孩子約會過(她們介於25歲到36歲之間)。我的想法是這樣的:台灣女人是自戀狂(譯註:Narcissist,取自於希臘羅馬神話水仙花的故事。),尤其是那些稍為有姿色的,更是不可一世。這些女孩子(作者曾約會過的),衣食皆仰賴父母。你如果沒有比她們有錢,千萬別評論這種生活型態,還有,正因為她們比你有錢,她們的父母特別挑剔,寧可找上千百個理由,也不願和你交往。


$$$$ is king, you can be fat, butt-ugly but if you are rich or appear rich, they will find every reason in the world to like you. And if you are not, you can become 'friends' with them, you simply become her platonic biitch, she only calls when she needs you and will never ever admit she is just using you for material things but will always give you you subtle hints of the Coach, LV, or expensive electronic gadget that she really really wants for her B-day.

錢就是無冕之王。只要有了錢,台灣的女孩子和她們父母就會特別哈你,就算你又肥又醜,她們還是找得出理由貼著你;要是你沒錢,沒關係,你還可以與她們當無「性」的「朋友」,然而,她們在有麻煩事時,才會找你;換言之,你成了卑賤的奴隸,得為她們做牛做馬。她們就是只貪圖現實利益才與你來往,但卻從來不肯承認。她們一有機會就會暗示你,要你送她們LV或Coach之類的名牌包包,或是要你在她們生日的時候送一些超貴電子產品。

Worse, forgetting to bring her purse when inviting her & her friends to meet you. And if she brings it, puts the onus on you to pay for it by sitting there silently, not moving, as if waiting for the 'traditional-male' to pick up the tab.

還有更糟的咧!也許你會邀請這些女孩子(還有她們的朋友),請她們參加一場聚會,但她們總是不會帶自己皮包出來;如果她們有帶包包,她們也不會主動付款;她們會靜坐在那兒,一動也不動,好像在等一位古紳士付款;換言之,她們把「付款」的責任交給男生了。

And if she is poor, she is even more materialistic. I remember our company hired a TWN girl (27) never held a steady job, complain to us how little she makes and how her mom has no job and how she has to support her mom... then I found out her 1st paycheck, she went out and bought a IPhone4.. Saying how it was always her dream. All I can say was "wow" thinking how full of shhit she was.

有錢的女孩還好,沒錢女孩更是「崇拜物質」到某種可怕的境界。我曾經在某家公司服務,這家公司請了一個女生(27歲)。這女生從未有過穩定的工作,總是向我們(公司人員)抱怨自己的薪水好少,抱怨她的老媽沒有工作,抱怨自己必須供她老媽吃住;然而,她第一次領薪水的時候,我看到她把錢拿去買一台「愛瘋4」。
她說:「擁有一台「愛瘋4」是我的夢想。」她真是有夠爛的啦,我大開眼界,只有這樣才能形容她了!

And I'm talking about girls that aren't even that attractive. Maybe a 7/8 out of 10. Yes I'm being shallow by putting them on a scale like that, but if I'm one feet deep, these girls' can be measured in micrometers.

接下來呢,我來談談那些不怎麼吸引人的女生吧。如果滿分有十分,台灣女生在大概有七分(或八分)。對啦,這種評鑑標準實在膚淺。但我得講:「如果我的深度只有30公分,台灣女孩子的深度就只能用微米來計算了。」

The younger ones that are even semi-attractive, are even more materialistic and pretentious. Most pretend they are not materialistic. And the few that are not after $$$, are after Beiber looks no matter how gay-looking or
irresponsible these guys are.

來講講那些比較年輕的台灣女孩子吧!她們的確有點吸引力,但又更「虛榮做作」(譯註:Pretentious,做作。)。她們嘴巴不承認,身體倒是挺誠實的。她們不是拜金,就是「拜帥哥」,就算那些哥們的長相鳥得像是「賈斯汀‧比伯」,看起來不負責任又很娘,她們就哈這種的!

Most don't have a job and those that do, spend as much money on their looks as the girls. There are no Rambos, athletic real man here (ok maybe 5% of population, sorry to these real guys).

這些娘炮沒有工作,又喜歡像娘們打扮自己,花掉大把銀子。我在這兒看不到像藍寶的人,強又imba(好啦,搞不好有5%的人口還滿強壯的,在此向這些人道歉。)

The guys these girls hang out with are perfect mirror of themselves,devoid of any personality and has the sophistication of a Lego block. Most of the skinny, wannabes gay looking guys (they actually think they are model-quality!!) hang around disco clubs, malls like spoiled rich American teenagers and spend all their money on the latest fashion craze.

這些女孩子所喜歡的男生,就是自己的完美寫照:「完全沒有個性,每個人都像樂高積木一樣制式。」這些愛美的娘炮(他們還以為自己是個天生的模特兒!),流連於夜店,像個有錢頹廢美國青年,虛擲萬金,就只是為了打扮自己。

The guys are so skinny and feeble (I'm sure they can double their size if they went to gym and worked out) that if a typhoon come suddenly, they all be blow to the ocean. The only thing that makes their wheel turn are MSN, SKYPE, Facebook, self-portraits of themselves plastered all over each other's home pages.

娘炮看起來又瘦又沒什麼力氣(他們要是肯健身,身體會是目前身體的兩倍大!),颱風一來,就可以把他們吹到海裡去。他們唯一有動力的時候,就是開MSN聊天、開Skype哈拉、看臉書、搞自拍照、或是把自拍照貼在另一個娘炮的網頁上。

God, they make Bieber look macho. No, I'm not the jealous type,I'm just telling it as it is. I've also been to China/Vietnam/Thailand and there is a world of difference in the girls' attitudes when I meet them.

媽呀,連「賈斯汀‧比伯」都比他們MAN!我絕對不是嫉妒她們,真的。。接下來呢,再來談談我在國外遇到的女生吧。我曾經到中國、越南、和泰國遊玩,那裡的女人就有於台灣女生,差異之大之多,令人咋舌。

I remember meeting girls that are 9 on a scale of 10, with no attitudes,no BS, no mark-ups that will put the TWN girls to shame.

使用和寫作邏輯來看,不太像是"以英語為第二語言的中文母語人士"寫的。像是:「最好又高,了解我,又負責任,我最喜歡這樣的男孩子了。」之類的。

True enough. Taiwanese women are the most selfish creatures I ever encounted. I used to live in Malaysia, Indonesia and Singapore and in all these countries. I met gorgeous and sincere ladies with well manners and
good heart. Since I took this job in Taiwan my sexual, emotional and dating life is totally fucked up...

確實,我遇過的女人中,台灣女生是最自私的生物。我曾經在住過馬來西亞、印度尼西亞、新加坡,還有一些國家。我遇過一些漂亮女士,大氣、待人真誠、有禮貌、心地又好。但自從我在台灣找了一份工作,我的性生活和情緒整個變得很糟。

And yes, never, ever EVER marry taiwanese bitch unless she makes you rich... You have to target women with money. Either self-employed or well paid professional with a thick saving accounts. BUT BE AWARE; Even if you
hold Phd from Gigolo University it will be pretty tough to squeeze any money out of her. Yet if you are that good or that lucky to put such spell on her then try your best to squeeze her dry. Once you take her money then you are the boss. You can enslave her and no matter what you do or how you treat her she will be submissive little bich that licks your toes hoping for the rest of her pathetic life that one day when you are off guard or off of your mind she might somehow get her ''investment'' back.

沒錯,千萬不要跟任何一個台灣女生結婚,除非她能讓你變得有錢。你得找有錢的女孩子,最好是自營工作者(Self-employed)或是有一定存款的專業人士。還有,一定要記住:「如果你是某個大學的博士,你很難從女人身上拿到錢。」如果你運氣夠好,一定要把她榨得乾乾淨淨。你只要拿了錢,就可以隨心所欲命令她。你可以讓她臣服於妳,就算你要她舔腳指頭度過餘生也沒問題,她就是冀望:「當你離開她的時候,你能把錢還給她。」


Piece of life saving advice;

救命守則:

If you are that good or that lucky, take her money, make her empty her accounts or sell the house or put her in debt if need. Don't feel any remorse and DO NOT HESITATE just take it all if you can. During the entire process make sure your passport is in the safe place.

如果你真夠幸運,能拿到錢,記得要榨光她的存款,賣掉她的房子,有需要的話,就讓她負債累累。別覺得這樣不好,也別猶豫不決,拿光就對了!在這過程中,確保你的護照安全。

Enjoy island for a while and fuck around. (especially those teenage little bitches, gold diggers. You have to tear them apart and destroy their little cunts the way that they won't be good for any cock anymore. You also have to fuck them in the ass until they have to wear dipers for the rest of their hello kitty miserable animal lives).

在這島上好好享受,到處開「苞」吧!(台灣的青少女特別的賤,特別愛錢。你必須玩到她們的賤鮑鬆掉,讓她們再也不能做那檔事情。你也可以玩她們的後庭花,玩到她們必須要包著紙尿褲,好能度過她們悲慘的人生。)

After you satisfy your rage and acomplish your revenge transfer all money to your country or switch it to good traveler's cheques and get the air ticet. Tell your squeezed bitch your father just passed away so you have to go without any delay. Or if you want to play with her a bit more just talk her into threesome and expose her to the brutal and painful double penetration together with some ruthless dude. You can even try asking her for more money or turn her into hooker. You can be her pimp for a while and see how it goes. But once you see black and thick question mark above her dumb empty head just get ready and get a hella out of here!!!

等到你滿意了,再把錢匯到你的國家,或轉成旅行支票,買張機票回家。跟你的賤女人說:「我老爸剛過世,我得馬上回去!」如果你還玩不過,那就帶她去跟某個殘暴的傢伙玩3P吧,最好讓她的後庭花和鮑魚都疼到爆掉。你甚至可以試著跟她要多一點的錢,讓她去做妓女,好讓她為你多賺一點。你可以當她的皮條客,看看情況如何。當你搞得他暈頭轉向的時候,你就趕快離開台灣吧!

============================分隔線===換文章了================================

TW girls... as far as I know, they wish they were japanese. When they speak, to differentiate their MANDARIN from what their Chinese cousins over in the mainland, they always speak in a really fake ass Japanese wannabe tone. It's so fucking lame. I know I know, there's a bit of history of Japanese occupation of TW, but you don't see Koreans, as cocky as they can be sometimes, completely idolizing another nationality to a point of basically copying them. It's funny how TW wants to be recognized as its own state, with its own nationality, but in the end, all their pride is nothing more than a facade, an image. And if the Japs have an attractive image, they'd rather become semi-Japanese. That's fucking lame dude. That's not pride, that's just ignorance and a lack of self-worth.

就我所知,台灣的女孩子希望自己是日本人。她們講話,就是刻意有別於中國大陸的腔調。她們總是用日本人的腔調在講話,又假又垃圾。真他媽的糟糕極了。我知道台灣曾經被日本人佔領過一陣子,但韓國人也有阿!為什麼韓國人不會像台灣女孩子一樣,完全把另一個國家當偶像,甚至想要完全效仿另一個國家?台灣想要在國際上成為一個「政體」,卻在另一方面不停模仿另一個國家,所謂的「台灣尊嚴」只流於表面。這真他媽的糟糕。沒有尊嚴,只有無知,不信任自己。

Then you get the whores, those rich ass international American born Taiwanese bitches. I've met one. She was ugly as fuck, FLAT face with wide nostrils and ugly ass fish lips. Her face looked like a puck or a pancake.But I'm not a superficial guy. I really wouldn't give a shit other than the fact that she has zero personality. She's always been a stuck up bitch, and if it wasn't for the fact that she was always ugly, she'd be on every daddies' dick.

你可能會把到幾個台裔美國婊子,屁股像美國人一樣肥。我就曾經遇過一個,長得跟鬼一樣醜,臉部沒有立體感,鼻孔又大,像魚一樣厚的嘴唇,臉扁扁,看起來就像一塊鬆餅。老實講,如果她只是外表難看,我還不會這樣瞧不起她,我沒有這麼膚淺,但那女生簡直是沒人格,我不得不這樣看她。她總是非常自傲;還有,如果她再長得好看一點,搞不好他會吸一堆老爹的屌。

When she was done with her highschool and university education in Toronto, she went somewhere in Asia, and got her rich ass family's funds to get a full face plastic surgery. Now she flaunts her pretty little flawless plastic face everywhere. She doesn't really work, her family pays for everything. She's just gonna marry some rich guy and suck off boyfriends on the side. That to me, pretty much sums up TW bitches. Born ugly, if you are from a rich background, then go get plastic surgery as a "reward" for getting through school studying god-knows-what, then going back to the states or canada or where-ever else and party until you suck off the right guy who will supply you with gucci and LV purses for the rest of your life.

那女的在多倫多完成高中和大學教育,她就回到了亞洲某地,用家族所給予的金錢做了一次整型手術。她現在到處誇耀自己完美無瑕的臉蛋。她沒有工作,吃家裡的,用家裡的。她同時跟一些男生交往,卻又想嫁給有錢人。對我而言,這根本就是婊子!如果你生來一副醜樣,但家裡有錢,麻煩做個整型手術,這樣子你在學校讀書就不會招來異樣眼光,最後再回到加拿大或是其他國家(隨便哪一個都行!),狂開派對,等到你找到一個有錢又能幫你買名牌包包的老公,你就能歡度餘生了!

Fuck, an ugly bitch turning into a swan through the operating table,and some turn of event somehow gives a TW hoe the right to be a bitch. What a joke. She used to be the most insecure person in the world even as a kid and in her teens and now all it took was some surgery... see how SHALLOW these TW chicks are.

醜小鴨靠著手術台就能變天鵝,爛透了。有些事情就是會讓台灣女孩子變成一個婊子。可笑極了。她在小孩和青少年時期時,(指那個醜女)超沒安全感,世界上沒人比她更沒安全感。現在只靠著整型手術,就變得超有安全感。看看這台灣女人有多膚淺。

Funny thing is, a lot of them are really stupid. Not just self-centered.This plastic TW bitch graduated from Uni. Toronto with something, not sure what exactly her degree was in (probably sucking cock for more surgeries).. ad now she works at retail at a SHOESTORE.

還有一件事情挺有趣的:很多台灣女人不只自我中心,還很蠢。這個醜女人(前文提到的)從多倫多大學畢業,還不知道她的文憑是哪一種(譯註:歐美大學文憑有很多種。)而她現在就在一間鞋子零售店工作。

Tawianese chicks are a joke. It's fucked up. I'm sure there are girls from all over like them but man, Taiwanese chicks can be pretty awful. None of them can support themselves or have any rational thoughts or goals, or the
desire to become a complete PERSON rather than a fashion accessory.

台灣婊子就是個笑話,爛透了。世界各地都有婊子,但台灣的婊子就是特別糟糕,她們無法養自己,思考一點也不理性,沒有人生目標,只想用飾品讓自己漂亮一點,也不想成為一個有人格的人。

來源:PTT 西斯版   作者  Nilo (辰)

2013年7月2日 星期二

人間異語:台灣男人 對性太假仙了


Q︰在妳異國戀經驗裡,外國男生跟台灣男生在性愛觀念上,有何差異?
A︰我蠻晚熟的,到大學才交男友。第一段是跟丹麥人交往,我們在英文補習班認識,他190公分,頗帥,來台灣短暫工作,說第一眼看到我,就很喜歡我。他主動追求,我們交往4個多月。那是我第一次和外國人發生關係,他給我很多驚喜,因他體格很好,可以嘗試很多,我從沒想過會有那麼多姿勢。只是他size太長,跟我身體不符合,我並沒有很舒服,比較多是感受被善待的過程。他離開台灣前,曾希望可以跟我繼續聯絡,我很想,但還是say no,因距離太遠,我沒辦法等。

之後,我又跟一位法國人dating,我發現他精神狀態不穩定,約會沒多久就甩掉他。讀研究所時,我到紐約遊學,邂逅一位美國人,他後來跟我回台灣,我們交往4年,他很正常,所以size和國籍無關。對我來講,技巧比較重要。他比我大快20歲,習慣早睡早起,喜歡清晨做愛,可是我明明還想睡,他一早6點就在我身上弄,讓我很不喜歡。這影響到我們做愛的頻率,最後就是很少做。他跟我分手後,回美國。

我工作後,換和台灣男生交往,只是他有很多壞習慣,會逼我口交,做些非常不禮貌的動作,我討厭這種男生。 我那些外國男友對身體的接受度廣,對性比台灣男生開放、自在很多。台灣男生面對身體和性,就跟面對自己的生活一樣假裝,不夠坦然。我那任美國男友認為做愛就做愛,何必要講一堆理由。他是性愛分離,會把浪漫放進做愛過程,重視彼此的愉悅。

台灣男生的性知識短少,常會事前很多鋪陳,過程卻很草率。我甚至感覺他們只想發洩。而我的外國男友自主性高,他們做愛前,會讓我知道他對我感興趣。假使我不想,我可以直接say no,表達我的感受。但台灣男生是跟你聊一聊工作,突然一拐彎,車就開進摩鐵。我若拒絕,他們會更盧,不懂得尊重。台灣男生表達能力有點便祕,造成溝通上的誤差,讓我搞不懂台灣男生到底想幹嘛?

台灣男生也比外國人更吝嗇讚美,最多就講句「不錯!」但外國人不同,他們會說:「你頭髮盤起來時,脖子好性感。」我從沒想過,我一個不經意的動作值得被如此稱讚。在台灣,我唯一不喜歡的一種老外,就是自我感覺良好,他們習慣批評台灣,好像自己很高檔。

Q:所以妳比較喜歡跟外國人交往?
A︰如果有緣分,我還是傾向和外國男生談戀愛,因他們直接,不遮掩,對任何事情都很明確,包括性,我可以很放心。台灣男生太迂迴、扭捏,我這不是崇洋媚外,而是覺得台灣男生需要檢討。 

http://www.appledaily.com.tw/appledaily/article/headline/20130702/35120299/